Right now we’re going through the miscarriage of our 3rd child, little “Riley” who’s about 6-7 weeks old. I’ve been bleeding for 4 days with cramping and back pain, the ultrasound is showing and empty sac, and my beta HCG levels have gone down from 5900 to 1700 in 2 days. We thank the Lord for giving us this little blessing even if we only got to spend less than a month with her inside mommy’s womb. In a few hours we’re going to the hospital most likely for admission and a D&C. As I take in this loss, I am encouraged by many verses such as the psalmist Asaph’s declaration that,
” My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.” – Psalm 73:26
Or Paul confidently saying,
“And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong. ” – 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
I too want to shout it out from the top of my lungs that,
“I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.” – Psalm 91:2
I remember Job and how he said,
“The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” – Job 1:21
I cry out to the Lord in pain and surrender,
“Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt.” – Mark 14:36
But as I go through each painful contraction and spend countless hours waiting for the result of the blood tests, or for the doctor to come, David’s Psalm 23 is foremost in my mind.
My daughter Allyra had to memorize this a couple of weeks ago for her bible class, and it was the first time I committed it to memory too. I looked for coloring pages for each verse to help her remember the verse and we compiled it in a folder.
How was I to know that I would need to have it in my heart for such a time as this…
We’ve done so many sheep crafts in the past 3 years as we studied about David and the Good Shepherd, and as I reflect on all that is happening, I take comfort in the love that our Good Shepherd has for us.
As Warren Wiersbe* beautifully points out, each of the OT names for God is seen in Psalm 23:
- Jehovah-Jireh, “The Lord will provide”
- Jehovah-Rapha, “The Lord will heal or restore”
- Jehovah-Shalom, “The Lord our peace”
- Jehovah-Tsidkenu, “The Lord our righteousness”
- Jehovah-Shammah, “The Lord is there”
- Jehovah-Nissi, “The Lord our banner,” and
- Jehovah-Raah, “The Lord is my shepherd,”
Dear Lord, you are indeed our Shepherd! There is nothing that we lack! You have graciously provided for all our needs: a loving family, a supportive husband, beautiful children, a spiritual family, caring friends… truly, we shall not want!
*Wiersbe’s Expository Outlines on the Old and New Testament.